lost:

job.

iPod.

cell phones.

jacket.

sleep.

friends.

sanity.

motivation.

control.

if we all don’t take cover…

As much as I love the excessive celebration, I need to tone it down a bit. Last night I had a lot of trouble sleeping because my heart was pounding so hard and it was freaking me out a bit. I should also mention that I basically spent the entire day hung over, despite not really drinking THAT much the night before. Maybe my liver is starting to fail me. Ok, that’s just being paranoid. Or overdramatic.

Thursday night I went over to Jessica’s to watch the premier of It’s Always Sunny. I was a little disappointed by the first two episodes, but as Freddy pointed out, they always get better throughout the season. After the ep I think we just went back to Prov and smoked hookah for the rest of the night. My mind is fuzzy. Alcohol was involved.

I had an interview downtown in the morning, so I took the bus. Interesting experience. I hate crowded buses. Jimena (eventually) met up with me and we walked all over downtown looking for the Farmer’s Market. We finally got there and it wasn’t so banging. I bought zucchini and nashi; Jime bought nothing. It was hot and I was still wearing all my business-y clothes, so I def wanted to get the fuck home.

Friday was Raba and Patino’s parties. We hit up Raba first. He always makes the best drinks. I made friends with his roommate and we bonded over strange things like Chron’s and military kids. I don’t have the disease and my father is not in the army, so I don’t know why we talked about those two things for so long. We left Raba’s fairly quickly and walked over to Magnolia. Waaaaay too many people there. I was also not as drunk as I should have been to be able to handle the situation. One kid def was though. I kept asking him questions because I knew he was so drunk he couldn’t speak, then he got up and vomited all over one of Lindsay’s coworkers. Gross but hilarious. people need to learn how to control their alcohol intake in public (though I’m the LAST person who should be saying that).

Saturday night was Brent’s Birthday Beerlympics and Ryan’s bithday. Jessica and I made a delicious Chicken Marsala dinner, but I tots forgot to take pictures of it. Lame. Freddy came over with homemade sangria, so we were pretty drunk before we realize we needed to Campus it over to Tuscany. By then the wait was over an hour, so we said FUCK IT we’re walking. Interesting decision. We made it though. Go us. The girls and I were dressed as Team Delta Force, but it didn’t really matter because we never competed. Hugh came and picked all 6 of us up in his teeny car (very unsafe) and took us to Ryan’s party. Drank some more, made some friends, took more pictures…typical Saturday night. We decided to go to another house party after Ryan’s which is stupid since we live right down the street from him, but luckily a friend drove us home when we realized our mistake.

Sunday sucked. Went to Encino for a group project. Tried to not feel like shit. Failed. Tried to do homework. Failed. Nothing on TV. Just an absolute failure of a day.

Today I came so close to quitting the Ticket Office. I am so done with it. There’s hardly anything for me to do there anymore and I hate that shirt more than life. Yes, I’m being overdramatic. I don’t care. At least TM called me back and want me to help them out. Hopefully that works out. I need to make new friends.

Went to lunch with Jess again. Brian saw me and ended up eating with us for a while. Surprisingly he had no bling in his ears…intersesting. I saw someone from high school and awkwardly kept looking at him to see if he recognized me, but decided it was best to let it go.

I want to have a crush on someone.

Pictures from the weekend:

Stop these looks and letters.

It’s been a while.

School is not so bad right now. 8 hours of class isn’t nearly as intimidating as I thought. I actually like some of the people in my classes too. That does not happen very often.

Labor Day Weekend was intense. Too much drinking. I thought I was done with the drinking every night deal. I can’t resist peer pressure and I can’t be sober at parties while also being social. Bad combo.

Thursday we attempted tried to go to this party on Ellendale, but we got distracted and ended up only being there for about ten minutes before DPS showed up and closed the party down. We after partied at Alec and Praveen’s place. It’s pretty sweet because they let you draw on the walls with chalk. That won’t be fun for them to clean up when they move out.

The house party Friday on 36th was fun. There were a lot of people there…a lot of people I don’t like. Got too drunk off of Jungle Drank and Purple Drank. Looking back on it, it’s really disgusting that I drank that shit, seeing as the distribution method was dipping cups in a cooler. Very sanitary.

Saturday Jessica had an impromptu get together at her apartment. Raba was there and did the usual ‘I was so drunk last night, I blacked out, did I say anything embarrassing?’ He did; I told him he didn’t because I didn’t want to hurt his feelings by letting him know that I won’t be going out with him. Brent and Derek where there for a bit. It was nice catching up with them because I haven’t seen them for a while.

Sunday was the White Party. Not many people actually wore white, so it was a good thing I was drunk and couldn’t feel awkward. I should have felt awkward for other things I did. Def woke up the next morning all dishevelled and with ‘Official armrest’ written on my shoulder.

As much as I love going on and seeing my friends, I wish they all weren’t friends with each other or just show up at the same parties in general. It’s not a good situation for me because then people know all about me. By that I mean they know all about which boy I’m into at the time. I need to stop my bad habits.

Last night Lindsay turned 21, so we went to the Golden Gopher to celebrate. The bouncer was convinced that Jamie’s ID was fake. It was hilarious slash incredibly annoying because it took to so long for him to determine it’s validity. The bar was pretty dead, but come one, it’s a Tuesday night. Some Mexican guys there were just fantastic…they kept buying us drinks. I still spent $20 on drinks, but it was for birthday reasons so I don’t care. OH, and they bought us roses! I never get flowers! Heart.

I was still drunk when I woke up this morning. Not good. I managed to get it together enough to make Lindsay’s cake, shower, and catch the tram to school for work though. Success!

The Ticket Office is in shambles. I need to get a new job, I just don’t know what I can get without a car. Plus I get paid a lot more here than I would at other places. I need the money, but money really isn’t everything. I need to rethink some things.

Why do I like boys who are addicts? It’s disturbing.

I want to fall in love.

it’s time to go.

I had a near death experience today.

My mother woke me up this morning asking, “Aren’t you supposed to be at work?’

Fuck. It was 7:20. I’m usually in my car on the way to work at that time.

After a minor hysteric episode, I managed to brush my teeth, put my contacts in, find something to wear, and race to DuPont.  Somehow i managed to get there in time to pick up the pool car and begin the 90 minute journey to Kelso for my morning interview.

Just outside of Olympia, I noticed a white moving van on the left side of the road. I glanced in my rear view mirror to see what was going on behind me, as if the cars behind me could miraculously explain what was happening. As I continue driving at 70 mph, THE FUCKING WHITE VAN TRIES TO MERGE LEFT AT 10 MPH. I screamed, swerved a little, glared over at the white van driven by two hispanics, and kept driving, though after that incident, I was terribly shaken up. I really don’t think I’ve ever been that scared in a car before.

I made it to Kelso and back to my house to shower without any problems, thank god.

Lately my head feels really strange. Maybe it’s my contacts. Maybe it’s the fact that I sit in front of a computer screen for 8 hours a day, bored out of my fucking mind. Maybe it’s my terrible eating habits. I need an Advil.